MEN'S BREAKFASTS

I have never cared much for church sponsored Men’s Breakfasts. And business or Chamber of Commerce breakfasts are worse.

I know it is probably just I and those of you who have gone to some may love them. Blessing on you. I am not one of those people. Forgive me.

Men come to these and treat them as their own little private gathering with their friends. I suppose that’s not horrible, but it is sure threatening if you are new or not one of those special groups. These are often promoted as a place to come and meet some of the men in the church. They used to always be called a “fellowship groups.” This will prove to you that I have been around churches too long. It’s not the worse word one could use, but where else in this big wide semi-wonderful word is “fellowship” used as often as it is/was in the church.

When “fellowship” was mentioned it meant food. As a young skinny guy (wait a minute, was I ever skinny). As a younger thinner man, it was much easier to say, bring the food on. I started eating way too much very early. Now I am a big man. I think I like the expression used for larger women better — plus size. Plus what? And I digress.

So back to the subject: Community breakfasts were for the purpose of connecting and trying to sell your wares to one another. They certainly never used the word “fellowship.” And I never sold anyone anything. I have the wrong personality.

So all these groups come together to eat much connect for selfish purposes and listened to someone talk and talk and talk. I have avoided these gathering for a very long time now.

I broke that pattern this morning and went to my church’s Men’s Breakfast. I convinced a friend to go with me so I would not be alone. There were only eight of us. It was initially a little awkward with all conversation between an individual and the pastor/ OK, that’s a food place to start. With three church services one does not know if people are new or just attend a different service. As it turned out, two guys were really new. One had attended Sunday for the first time and he brought a buddy who had never attended. I still consider myself on the somewhat new side. I don’t know very many people, but was hopping this might help make that change. Besides these guys, I didn’t know two others as well.

At the beginning it was the normal, insignificant chitchat, an OK place to start. But it was the “never attended guy” that got the fun conversation going.

I don’t think he was specifically directing his question to me but he looked at me asked if I collected coins. Of course, I do, but I spend them as soon as I get them. There was a smile but people began to ask him questions and the conversation got going on collections. It ended up being a great morning of getting to know each other a lot better, having many great laughs, and finding out that many of us watch the same History Channel shows. My only regret was that I didn’t know the names of four of the guys that were there, until we were all getting ready to leave. The “never attended guy” got that rolling as well by asking us our names and introducing himself. I loved it.

So I have an idea. Some of the more regular guys need to have in their head two or three general conversation starter questions that will open up the group. It will most likely going to take off from there. Keep them easy and open ended with a design to get people acquainted. Yes, I know this is much easier with eight people than three hundred and that is a whole different dynamic. But if the group were that large, I would stay home.

Of course this will not work every time, but anything to make it enjoyable and help the group reach the [point where they don't walk out as soon as they finish eating. We had only waffles and some toppings. A perfect amount and someone remember us diabetics. Yeah!