TO EAT OR NOT TO EAT

I’m confused. No, it’s not the first time and it won’t be the last time. The confusion leads to frustration. I don’t know who to trust or what to trust. Maybe you feel the same way.

It has everything to do with contradictions — the contradictions about what will kill me if I eat it and what used to kill me if I eat it and now I can eat it and will not die. Do you ever get the feeling that even the experts do not know what they are talking about?

Today it is chocolate milk. Remember the old saying “I’d rather my kids drink chocolate milk than no milk at all.” Brian Williams told me tonight that drinking chocolate milk might not be a good idea (sugar). I can’t even begin to tell you how many things I have eaten that might not be a good idea.

I took the slippery slope route to fat in milk. I went from whole milk to 2% to 1% and then fat free only to learn that I am lactose intolerant. I can use all the milk substitutes on or in things, but I cannot longer drink what is called milk. Yuck! It’s the taste! While I am surviving, I cheat by having no sugar added ice cream. I am a little tired of the five available flavors, because I like variety. OK, I like cookie dough, or Butterfinger or anything with nuts, and I indulge from time to time.

I can avoid candy. Not much temptation — that is unless it’s rich homemade fudge. Yummm. I love freshly baked “anything.” I am not so tempted by the mass produced and prepackaged cookies in the grocery stores. I am a little tempted by the bakeries, but I cannot resist homemade baking. I try (maybe not very hard), but I’m addicted.

I have avoided many of the major addictions of Americans. I don’t drink (maybe a little one on a rare occasion). I have never smoked — anything. I don’t gamble. I don’t shop away my depression. I don’t participate in any of the major “sinful” activities. All I do is overeat or eat unhealthy things. The church taught me to do this with their frequent potlucks. They don’t do that so much any more. It has nothing to do with a healthy movement and everything to do with size. It has not been given up completely they still do it in their home groups. So I can still do it through the church but not as conspicuously.

Now I have no intention of launching a campaign to eat better (so sue me). I attend a weekly Bible Study where the hostess makes the most wonderful baked goods. Her — I want to encourage her to keep up the good work.

I have little doubt that people will gasp or at least frown at my horrid bad habits, nor will they like my life motto “We all die of something.” Well don’t you want to live longer? Sure, why not. I’m enjoying life. But I do not want to live on rice cakes and water. I want to enjoy the wonderful joys of food. You may now throw rotten tomatoes.