BLACK FRIDAY

What happened to Black Friday? Where did it go and who stole it? I know the general concept is there, but when is it?

Back in the olden days (two years ago or so) it was the Friday morning after Thanksgiving, or maybe even the middle of the night. I think the big day started at 4:30 or maybe even 5:00 a.m. I’m not really sure as I was rarely up at that time of the night. Of course, with age that has changed a bit. No matter, I could never have gotten myself together enough to go out in the dark, camp out of wait in line to spend money regardless of what a great buy was waiting.

I only did it once for the experience. My daughter and I went to some big box store to get specific items. We both managed to get our hands on some of what we wanted, but the checkout was the worst experience of my life (probably an exaggeration). I was in line for one hour and twenty minutes – and the store had every register open and running. The people in front of me had so much stuff it made me wonder where they all got their money. Two items were not worth the wait.

That was then and this is now. Everything in advertizing is about Black Friday, but I swear they have no idea when Friday it or what week the particular “Black Friday” is to be held.

I have noticed several places online, notably Amazon and Groupon where I can buy items at B lack Friday prices now. Maybe this is OK for them since their plan maybe to ship it to me on Black Friday. But there was a TV ad of a store that had Black Friday prices last Friday. Just a little jump-start I guess.

K-Mart is open all day Thanksgiving. Kohl’s open’s at 12:01 a.m. Friday morning (Midnight actually). A few others have announced that same start. Target wants a jump on Kohl’s so is opening at 11:00 p.m. Thursday. I can’t remember who it is, but someone is opening at 9:00 p.m. Thursday. And of course, all grocery stores will be open all day.

Between shoppers and sales clerks cutting into so many family days, who is left to have Thanksgiving with? I know emergency services have always missed out on either Thanksgiving or Christmas. Things are so confusing that we may as well have a Thanksgiving week and a Christmas week when people can celebrate when ever it fits their schedule. Fundamentally, many families have to do that now. With that change stores could maintain their regular hours and be open all the time. In reality, there is no Black Friday any more, so let’s officially abandon it.

There is really no need for any official declaration; it looks like it is going to die a natural selfish death. So to that ancient shopping day of years gone by, I say farewell and good riddance. I for one will not miss you one bit. I hate the hype, I hate the crowds and I hate the checkout lines and most of all I prefer a newspaper devoid of a hundred or more flyers (maybe another slight exaggeration). I like your prices, but I hate what you expect of me to get those bargains. I feel like Pavlov is at work again. Yum, yum!

I'M BACK AND SOMEWHAT ALERT

River Front Park on Dyes Inlet looking toward Bremerton.

Well, the arts, Crafts and Bake sale are over. Several people did really well, I just didn’t happen to be one of them. Asked during our pack up what I would do differently next year my response was “not do it.” Of course that might change in a few months. The physical drain is a major strain on me. The emotional drain as I ached for those who made little to nothing is even greater. I am less concerned about me. But four vendors did not even make their table (make enough to pay for the table costs). I cannot correct that. What would draw me back next year is that three key vendors are from The Home and each need extra money and got it. As for me, I have another shot and more likely better shot still coming. I will set up my art show the Saturday after Thanksgiving. The artist reception will be Dec. 16. I have four drawings completed and another with about 2 hours drawing left. I hope that by the 16^th I will have completed another three completed. I could come out of the hole then.

Having the show in Old Town is convenient for us, but parking is always a problem. A big show attracts my people, but that is not possible in this area. Last year we checked area rental spaces and the cost was prohibitive. Since most vendors are new to the scene and inexperienced, any cost is frightening, but we have to pay for advertising some way.

Even if I sell nothing at the art show, I am preaching again this coming Sunday and that will get me out of the hole. I hate to think of preaching as a means to profit, but in this case it is helpful if not necessary.

My strange dreams continue. I have no recurring dreams and I cannot see a theme. I am not yet ready to attribute them to senility, but they are not coming from any sphere of reference of which I am aware. They are not frightening nor threatening. In retrospect, they are somewhat humorous but I call them strange.

The most recent ones had to do with boxes. I was closing them up and trying strong around them. These were not Christmas package’s, they were plain brown cardboard boxes. I was not taping, gluing or fastening them together with anything but string. I only saw one at a time, but since them kept coming I have no idea about quantity. I was no overwhelmed. Had I been I would have connected the dream to the craft show. I was reasonably happy. That’s the strange part. I have never enjoyed repetition.

I was sick of people at age 18 and left the shoe store to take a job in a warehouse. It paid more. The first day two of us was given pricing guns and told to correct prices on the boxes coming down the belt. The boxes were all ready packed with product and we had to put a new sticker over the old price. The speed of the belt reminded me somewhat of the “I Love Lucy” chocolate factory show. We had to keep at a steady pace and had no control over the speed. When a buzzer sounded we got a break. It took so much concentration that the two of us only spoke at the break. Guess what. That was my first and last day as an assembly line worker. I decided money wasn’t everything.

By the way, when I woke from the box dream, if felt like a lunch break. I awoke hungry, but really had to go to the bathroom.

I'LL BE BACK IN ANOTHER WEEK

I'm overwhelmed because I have two art shows I am preparing for. The first is next weekend and I need at least another week. There were days in the past I could easily handle this, in fact seemed to like it. Now, I wear out way to quicjly and both my body and mind need a rest from that pace and the activity.

As soon as that show is complete, I need to hang my drawings on Nov. 26. The open house for that is not until Dec. 16th, so I will have time to add more pieces. I was trying to work at two pieces a week, but find I cannot maintain that. The first is also a craft show so I have many little pieces (tree ornaments) I am also working on. That is a project with my daughter and grandkids. It will come to an end soon.

Just want to say, I am not depressed and I will continue my story of God's redemption and blessing. Based on some comments I guess I left the impression I am depressed. No, I was when all this happened, but the story will be one of redemption and joy. I just like to end with a bit of a teaser to make people wonder what is coming next. It may have sent the wrong message especially since I haven't written for awhile.

Like someone famous (actually more than one someone famous), I'll be back.

A LOVE LOST

I swear love makes people stupid. It made me stupid. I met the woman of my dreams at a Bible College in Canada.

My buddy convinced me to come with him to this college in Canada. We both had visions of mountains and learning to ski. We were dumb Americans from the Midwest. The only pictures I had ever seen of Canada were of places like Banff. Neither of us seemed to know that Regina, Saskatchewan was in the middle of the flattest place on earth. A speed bump was treated as a mountain. No matter that it was a shock rather than a vision, it was an adventure.

The school had a funky little snack shack called “Tuck Shop.” Don’t know why, but that always seemed a strange name. One of the student workers was this blond girl with sparkling eyes and a beautiful smile. I liked her immediately. My next-door room neighbor told me he was dating her. I hated him immediately. Maybe that was too strong. Actually, I decided I would just work at being her friend. It did not take long for me to learn the “liking” part was one sided and she didn’t share his feelings. A crack in the door developed. I pursued more and more conversation with her. We had no classes together as she was a year ahead, but I began to know where she would be at certain times and also figured out her work schedule. I studied her movement more than my homework. I was going stupid.

The young man who rented a room had a similar impact, but a different kind of love. He came into my home because of the place he was living at the time. He believed his relatives were treating him badly. He was far from his mother and I had the space.

We talked often. He was a fine Christian boy with a heart for God. He was warm and friendly and all I wanted to do was help him. I don’t know when it turned from a desire to him to wanting to protect him, but it did. I don’t know when protecting him moved to rescuing him. I have always regretted dragging him to his bank because of over draft charges to get it corrected. He was going deep into a hole paying for the use of his debit card by being charged $18 each time he used the card after his money was gone. They would let him go $400 in the hole before they would stop it so is over draft charge were getting close to his monthly income.

Rather than explaining his options and letting him handle the matter, I treated him like a child being taken advantage of and took him to the bank to fix the situation. I stole his independence and his manhood. I turned him into a little. To me he was a great son in need of a father figure and I wanted to be that father. I wanted him as my replacement son for the one I lost. I smothered him, offended him and lost him. My emotions were out of control. My depression at the lost of my own son and my guilt in trying to find out what I had done to cause his death and the grief for my wife that was returning was destroying whoever I had been.

He met the girl of his dreams and I knew that would end our relationship. I failed him miserably. I was stupid. I had taken this vessel of clay God had given me mold in His image and began to try to shape it in my own. I took responsibility that was not mine to take.

By Gods grace, he is a fine man of God. But rather than being an adult friend, my own heartbreak led me lose a relationship that began and sustained a long time as a wonderful and positive thing for us both.

This affected my work at the church and led to the end of my ministry and the beginning of struggling for survival.

MY SON

I’m trying to remember why I started this blog. I know a friend had urged to do it and in my early days of living in The Home I really thought must of what occurred her was rather funny. I was surprised at how juvenile 60+ years old could act. It is beginning to seem all so normal.

CW has moved out. People are upset that our own residents are stealing items from a collection box of warm clothes for the homeless. And we get an onsite manager beginning Monday. The Ivory Tower, in their infinite wisdom, is sending over one of their own to work in this office to look after us and do some head office type of work as well. So, life goes on as normal and little I see seems out of the ordinary any longer.

I do write to express myself because I like writing. But I also know I say little of importance and talk about issues in only the lightest of terms. This may only be a brief departure from frivolity, but I want to write (as least for a few blogs) about my journey from being a “have” to a “have not.” The economy is going south and many are struggling just to keep their heads above water, I have been doing this for over ten years. I’ve adjusted to living on less, but I blow it at times. I have blown it this month already and it is only the fifth day.

I left, resigned and/or was fired from a church in 1999. I will not go into all the details, but the accusations were emotionally true, but not actually true. I had rented rooms to young adult men since shortly after my daughters wedding. It was a good arrangement. In 1995 I took in a young man who was a diamond in the rough. He was everything I had wanted my own son to be, but was not. My son committed suicide in December of 1993. It has taken years to accept that I did not cause his death. He was 24 at the time. Needless to say, I did not cause it. But parents feel like they are responsible for the actions of their children when their choices are dramatically different from that of the parents. His were. We ask where did we go wrong, what did we do, how did we fail. It is easy to forget free will and the church will not let us forget “train up a child in the way he should go.”

I began working in my last church three months after the death of my wife. Everything was new and I was definitely different. I grieved for my wife for five years in a slow and agonizing release. I doubt I knew how much I loved her until she was gone. I was adjusting to that loss and 18 months later within one day of being to the day, I lost my son. December 20, 1993. Christmas!

I had to deal with the awful feeling of relief that he was gone. I had lived with the constant fear that he would die without us ever knowing. Much of the last 6 years of his life was an unknown. We did know where he was or what he was doing. He returned home only to recover from illness or detox himself. We had lost him at 18 years of age. We just didn’t know it.

My wife died, not from anything I did, but of disease that came in the flow of life. My son’s death was anything but natural. I was still denying my need for emotional help to cope and adjust when into my life came the son of my dreams. He was emotionally young for his 20 years, but he was loving, kind, considerate, and helpful and a joy to be around. I loved him.

To be continued.

OCEAN PARK BUILDING

This is drawing Number two.

COURAGEOUS

The biggest news in out part of this tiny little world is Kim Kardashian and her marriage, divorce to Kris Humpheries. Outside of the sports world, who ever heard of Kris — and while I’m at it, why is Kim famous. Only in America are people famous for being famous. What did she do – cure cancer, feed the homeless, save the earth?

Right behind her is the lawsuit filed against Justin Bieber claiming he father the child a one Mariah Yeater in a 30 second tryst at a concert in Los Angeles. I understand he would have been 16 at the time. He has certainly jumped into the rock lifestyle quickly, if it is true.

But why are these important pieces of news? How sick are we as a society? Why do nobodies and entertainers get the limelight? It is because we give it to them. We eat up their trash. What happened to embarrassment about these activities? They used to be shameful acts.

I am grateful there are some who are trying to add a positive Christian influence to the world of entertainment, thankfully.

I went to see Courageous a few days ago. It is the most powerful sermon I have ever heard or seen about the role of men in the lives of their kids. In case you don’t know about it, here is their description.

“Four men, one calling: To serve and protect. As law enforcement officers, Adam Mitchell, Nathan Hayes, David Thomson, and Shane Fuller are confident and focused. Yet at the end of the day, they face a challenge that none of them are truly prepared to tackle: fatherhood. While they consistently give their best on the job, good enough seems to be all they can muster as dads. But they're quickly discovering that their standard is missing the mark. When tragedy hits home, these men are left wrestling with their hopes, their fears, their faith, and their fathering. Can a newfound urgency help these dads draw closer to God ... and to their children?”

This is the fourth film produced by Sherwood Pictures and the brother acting, writing and production team of Alex and Stephen Kendrick. The first film of theirs I saw was Facing Giants. Another outstanding film made on a shoestring budget. Courageous was made for 2 Million and the opening weekend took in 9.1 million. Fireproof, their third film was made for $500,000 and earned 33 million. All this to say, the their films are being critically well received. Sherwood Pictures is produced by Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia. The whole church gets involved in the making of these movies. Many are volunteers.

Michael Catt, the senior pastor, writes about the beginning.

When looking for a media pastor, I contacted Alex. Though Alex was using his gifts and talents in ministry, he was not the director of media for his church. I saw a diamond in the rough. Alex came on board in 1999, and we called his brother Stephen in 2001.

God had been preparing these two from childhood to make movies. As kids they lived next door to a man who was interested in technical gadgets. He bought stop-and-go animation cameras, and Alex and Stephen used his equipment to make short videos. For years the boys put together homemade “chase ‘em down and beat ‘em up” movies. Later they produced commercials, movie trailers and even school projects.

I talked with Alex about where he wanted to be in five to ten years. He said, “I want to make movies, but no church is going to let me stay on staff and do that.” I replied, “Why not? Bring me a script and a budget, and let’s see if God is in it.” That conversation was the genesis of Sherwood Pictures. Our goal from day one has been to make family-friendly movies that build on the Judeo Christian ethic and communicate the gospel without compromise. We want to make movies you could take your girlfriend or your grandmother to without embarrassment.

In 2001 we went to Orlando, Florida, for staff retreat and took a day off to hang out at Disney World. We took a behind the scenes tour and learned about their “imagineers.” As we walked around the park observing the attention to detail everywhere, we were challenged with this thought: If a secular company can be this committed to excellence, why can’t the church of Jesus Christ?

While in Orlando, I talked with Alex about where he wanted to be in five to ten years. He said, “I want to make movies, but no church is going to let me stay on staff and do that.” I replied, “Why not? Bring me a script and a budget, and let’s see if God is in it.” That conversation was the genesis of Sherwood Pictures. Our goal from day one has been to make family-friendly movies that build on the Judeo Christian ethic and communicate the gospel without compromise. We want to make movies you could take your girlfriend or your grandmother to without embarrassment.

What a great story. I hope you enjoy their movies as much as I have.