Tuesday, December 7, 2010

REDUNDANT

Don’t you just love question’s that when answered will probably embarrass you? Questions like: Do you work out. If you answer no, the questioner feigns shock. He may say nothing but he means, “That explains why you’re so fat.” If you doubted that I worked out, why did you ask?

One that annoyed me years ago and caused my smart mouth to click on all by itself came during a time of great conflict with my son. A lovely church lady asked do you have an open line of communication with your son? No, that’s why we’re fighting like this. Get real. When you see steam coming out the tops of heads things are not going well. That is your clue to MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. Never ask the obvious.

It’s unreal how often this happens. Just watch someone struggling to carry some things that are more than can be managed. Do you need help? No, I just want carry these until my back breaks and you have to call 911.

Many of these questions are meant to be polite. I know and I appreciate it, but it feels like the point is to make us both look stupid. I was decorating the Christmas tree the other day when another resident asks, are you decorating the tree? No. I’m trying to get decorations off as fast as these others put them on. Duh! You walk in the house and are immediately overwhelmed with the wonderful aroma of a cinnamon rolls, fresh bread, pumpkin pie, etc. and ask are you baking? No, I’ve put the garbage in the blender to make it smaller.

I actually respond to all these questions as most people do. I just answer them as though they were serious question, but in my mind I know those people are crazy.

2 comments:

Cartoon Characters said...

When I am in a store and asked "Do you need help?" - I always respond with "No, I am beyond help".....then they laugh.

I like to turn everything into a joke. ;)

Clyde said...

I've used that myself, but actually prefer to make a smart remark, especially if I think I can get away with it. Shame on me.