THE LOSS OF SIGHT

I took Maria to her eye doctor on Thursday of last week. While she was there I went to see Dracula at my clinic to give up even more blood. I seem to be doing this once a month. Bloodsucker! When I returned to get Maria she was hurtin’ pretty bad. She had a shot in her left eye. I mean they stuck a needle right in the cornea. That hurts. I cringe when I hear about it. We arrived at The Home where she took her sunglasses off and asked if her eye was bleeding. It was, and it dripped down and over her lower eyelid.

She told me that everything in her right eye very blurry. I knew she had trouble seeing. That never stopped her from giving driving directions and telling me where to turn and how and where to park. Also, she is worried about what I might hit if I don’t listen to her. OK, so one eye is bad. I now know she only expects for it to get worse. Now the left eye they are trying to save is giving her great pain and she is worried she is going to lose that one as well and will then be blind. This is considerably worse than I expected. My heart was breaking for her.

She is in pain every day. Her spirits are down. She is leaving in the middle of discussions instead of being the last to leave. She is still trying to jump in every conversation with one-up-man-ship, the bigger and better story. But she has added anger to her already difficult communication skills. She is taking her anger out on everyone around her. People are avoiding her. They can no longer take the correction, the anger, the interruptions, and the putdowns. She is beginning to feel people withdrawing. But she is in such pain with her eye she doesn’t seem to care. She needs to leave and sleep. The struggle those around her all face is to reach out to her and protect their own emotions.

The Home is installing automatic doors to both buildings to make it easier for those in wheelchairs to get into the building. They have always struggled to unlock the door, pull it back and get their chair through the door. There was a meeting at the front door today with the contactor, our maintenance crew and a few of those in wheelchairs. Maria also attended, uninvited but there. She did everything she could to get her two cents in. She was completely ignored and let everyone know how unhappy she was. She let the ones in wheelchairs know that it wasn’t all about them. Others needed the automatic door openers and therefore had every right to help decide placement of the controls. She was especially upset when one in a wheelchair had to leave and said she trusted Chas and would leave the decision with him. It was agreed too by everyone but Maria. She was mad and mumbled under her breath what an incompetent Chas is. Fortunately he kept his mouth shut.

We were expecting a week of peace as Leslie is off on an Alaskan Cruise. But is seems that Maria has stepped in to fill the gap. I think I will join the group who is trying to stay out of her way. I like my head where it is.