KING JAMES TRANSLATION

For the past several days I have been studying an article from the December 2011 issue of National Geographic. It seemed a strange subject for them, but an interesting one nonetheless. “The King James Bible – Making a Masterpiece.” I have never really known much at all about the 1611 Bible publication other than it has been the English standard for a very long time — over 400.

I was interested in the chart reflecting the various translations that preceded the King James Version. They report of eighteen of them, many, which I recognized, but knew little. I wasn’t so much fascinated by that process as the impact the KJV has had on the English culture.

“The King James translation introduced eighteen classic phrases into the English language” some of which are:

The root of the matter

Stand in awe

As a lamb (led) to the slaughter

A thorn in the flesh

Suffer (the) little children

Get thee behind me (Satan)

A still small voice

How the mighty have fallen

East of Eden

Know for a certainty

Unto the pure all things are pure

Lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven

No small stir

Much study is a weariness of the flesh

To everything there is a season

The skin of my teeth

Fell flat on his face

From time to time

Pour out your heart

Put words in his mouth

Set thine house in order

Be horribly afraid

I for one have used every one of them as some time or another. Some I was aware were from Scripture. Others were so common I never gave them a second thought. I grew up on the KJV, as did everyone in my age group. Many, not just churchgoers, knew –parts of the Bible. In my public school classroom was the quote “Spar the rod and spoil the child.” I think it was there as a threat. Many homes had plaques with Biblical phrases. In my friend Saul’s home (Jewish) hung “Train up a child in the way he should go.” My own home displayed “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” We also had the framed print by Warner Sallman of “Christ at the Door.”

I struggle to quote Scripture from a modern translation even though that is what I now read. I just learned far too many verses in the KJV. So many in fact that when I try to quote something in a modern translation I get it all mixed up.

Since 1611, hundred’s of new translations have come and gone. It seems like there is a new one every year or so. With this diversity, none will ever compete with the popularity of the KJV, but all are trying to do the very same thing for which the JKV was translated. They want to put Scripture into the language of the people.

I have never had much patience with those who hold to the belief that the KJV is “THE BIBLE” and nothing else will do. I know Shakespeare is popular in some circles, but it is difficult, if not impossible, to read by the average person. He wrote in the same time period as the JKV was written. They sound the same because it is the same language. Admittedly there is something somewhat romantic about the KJV, if not emotionally connective. But if you did not grow up with it, there are some difficult words. I liked the fact that my KJV version had the punctuation markings for all those extremely difficult to pronounce Biblical names. The pastor I worked with in my first church had a habit of handing me an Old Testament passage to read in the service just as we were about to walk onto the platform. I was thankful for those pronunciation markings. However, the key factor in actually reading these name-riddled passages is not the correct pronunciation as much as reading them with clarity and authority. When one does that people begin to think they are finally learning the correct pronunciation. How would I know? I just spoke with authority.

THE BIG FIRE

Sunday I went to Olympic High School to watch my oldest granddaughter play soccer. They scored quickly in the opening few minutes and then the other team took over and dominated the game until the last five minutes. In the last 30 second, our team scored again and tied the game. It was a fun day. While my son-in-law and I were sitting watching the game, which started at 2:00 p.m., the first picture arrived on the phone of the family sitting next to Chris. There was a fire in a coffee shop in town.

Isn’t technology amazing? The photo arrived about ten minutes after the fire began. As it turned out the coffee shop was just one of seven business’ that were totally destroyed by fire. It started in a tanning bed when a bulb popped. The young girl on the bed got up and got dressed and went to report the small fire that had begun. When employees checked, the whole room was ablaze and alarms were going off. The fire quickly burst into the attic and the entire small shopping complex was ablaze.

This was a big deal in our little down. When I was returning from the soccer game I came over the hill and could see the smoke. It wasn’t that far from The Home. It was big news and, of course, it made the Seattle news stations. The entire complex was a total loss.

I don’t know why it began weighing on my mind, but I was thinking about all those small businesses. They are now instantly closed. Sure, Insurance will cover their loses, but what about income. The owners will not have an income until they can find a new location or the complex is rebuilt. All their employees have suddenly lost their jobs. I suspect the majority were minimum wage jobs, but people who work for those wages need the money the most. My heart went out to those who are now unemployed through no fault of their own.

I don’t know about the job openings in this area. One of the dangers of being retired is losing track of all the cultural impact in the county. Our area is basically dependent upon the Navy. There are two bases. These are secure jobs and provide a steady financial base. But several families have now been unexpectedly hit with a hardship. These people will need jobs now.

Life changes on a dime. Many things come our way suddenly without warning. A vehicle runs into us. A bone is broken. A heart attach is experienced. A family member suddenly dies. We are unexpectedly thrown into emption trauma. A teenage daughter announces she is pregnant. A child is picked up by the police and placed in jail. A son runs away. We are never prepared for the sudden changes that come into our lives, but we must adjust. We must adapt. And we will. We do. We have to. Change is constant and as we all know. It is not all-good change.

JUST A MINUTE

What could the words “Just a minute” possibly mean? Could it mean “I’ll be right with you.” How about “I’m busy right now, but I will be there soon.” Maybe “I’m tied up right now, hang on.”

I am reasonably sure it does not mean, “Come one in.” That interpretation is not even close.

I had just gone into the bathroom. I live alone. I do not shut my bathroom door. I have never felt there was a need. Neither do I lock my door. So, the door opened and the disembodied voice said, “I’m in.” Wait! I thought I said “Just a minute.” I’m confused. It never occurred to me that could be interpreted as, “Come on in.” But she did. She walked right in past my bathroom door to my desk, said she left a Red Lobster coupon on my desk, turned around and left.

I’m not so embarrassed that I was in the bathroom. I was standing. I had my back to the door. I was ticked off that she felt she could walk in regardless of what I said and do what she wanted. It was just a piece of paper. SLIDE IT UNDER THE DOOR!

With an insignificant thing like a coupon, people normally slide it under the door. What was wrong with her? I know. She wanted me to know that she brought the note for me. Right now, I pretty much want her out of my life.

This is the woman that seems to believe she is personally responsible for my health choices. She showed up last night with the most god-awful tasting concoction that has touched my lips in years. She tried to tell me what was in it and the only word I remember is red peppers. I didn’t even recognize most of the other words. When I asked what it was, she forcefully told me that so-and-so upstairs thought it was delicious. That did not answer my question. I still did not know what it was. Is it vegetable, mineral or animal? I was pretty sure we were about to play 20 questions. It did not look like anything I has ever seen. It was somewhat runny. Maybe a little like a bad bowl of oatmeal with specks of red, black and green. It was somewhat brown with an orange tinge. It had not distinct smell, but there was also not enticing aroma.

I was still trying to pry out of her what it was. Is it a dip? It can be. It would be great with some delicate crackers. Delicate crackers? What’s wrong with saltines? Should I put anything on it? If you want to! What if I didn’t want to. That’s OK too. None of that was answering my questions. When I finally asked, what is its main purpose, she was upset with me. In a sarcastic tone she said it is used like a potato, rice or risotto. FINALLY! Why didn’t you say so.

Well, they liked it upstairs. I really wanted to say, take it back upstairs, but I decided to play nice. Thank you. I will try it. She left. I dipped my finger to get a taste and went and spit it out. I have already discarded it down the toilet. I’m a bad boy.

Today’s discount coupon is good for $4 off any two dinners or $3 off any two lunches. Did you get that? TWO! Maybe I’m reading something into this that I shouldn’t, but why did she bring it. It came in today’s mailbox ads that were put into everyone’s mailboxes. I had already seen them and already thrown mine away. I guess I’m not very grateful. I need to develop an attitude of gratitude — but not with her.

THE AFTERMATH

Why is putting up Christmas decoration so much more fun than taking them down? It takes far less time to remove them. I pitched in this morning to help take everything down and pack it in The Home’s storage space. I admit I was feeling a little tired, but I wasn’t sick. I have been dormant for nearly two weeks. I can’t do that any longer. Keep moving or freeze up. I was definitely locking up — joints not moving like they should. It was getting tired, but I stayed with the project. I needed to. My Christmas lights were on both trees.

I really hated the tree on the main floor. It was one of those where every branch had to be inserted in the trunk. We are not allowed live trees — fire hazard. Just as well. I would not have wanted to clean up the needles. I am not sure why these things come out of boxes so easily and do not seem to fit back in. We squished the branches as flat as we could and eventually got the box closed, but there is a big hump at the opening. There wasn’t much to do on the main floor. All the big ornaments standing and hangings had already been taken upstairs.

From there we went upstairs. There were only three of us working but as things came to a close and the ornaments were off the upstairs tree and the tree was laying on the floor in three sections, we sat down and began talking. Three more women joined us. It was light and fluffy stuff until it got around to my stay in the hospital. You could die. Yes, and I will — sometime.

I wish people would take the clues from the person they are discussing and stop, but all these mothers moved into Doctor Mom mode. I hate that. I was cared for in the hospital and given very clear and helpful instructions. I even have them written down. Why they felt compelled to correct and add their input is beyond me. I felt like screaming. One of them is so annoying I want to run everything I see her coming.

“How are you?” This is not a greeting type comment. It is a thorough investigation into everything about me. She always, and I mean always askes what she can do for me. Nothing, nothing, nothing! She does not get the hint. “I’m going out, is there anything I can get for you? “Yes, a new Corvette.” Slight smile – “No seriously.” “No, thank you.”

Menus were tossed around; the best types of food were discussed. They clarified that a low salt diet did not mean — no salt (I KNOW). They suggested alternative spices and assured me that each one was wonderful and that I would like them. How do they know I would like them? I almost decided to hate them just because they assured me I would like them.

My “mother” just left. She had been out and returned with chestnuts that she just knew I would love. I disappointed her. They taste like something someone else chewed and spit out. She bought them special for me. She had been to Trader Joes and brought me a list of everything in their store that was low salt. I was expected to be excited. There was so much on the list and the print was so small I needed a magnifying class to read it. When I could make out some words, I was aware that even things a normal person would assume had no salt was included. Maybe some fruit juice has added salt, but the list assured me that there was no salt added.

I don’t mind a comment or two, but when the conversation will not stop they should have figured out that I had tuned out some time ago. It’s not that I don’t care, it’s that the advice was unsolicited and I DON’T CARE.

NEW BEGINNINGS

It felt great to walk over for coffee this morning and not be panting when I got there. Breathing is cool. Eating too much salt for someone like me is stupid. Does that help some of you are thinking I was such an idiot? I think I’m one too. I really piled the salt on in a seven-day stretch with ham and a final supper of popcorn. I know, I know. There are plenty of substitutes.

Frankly, I could not have had better treatment at Harrison Hospital. And I am amazed how good the food was. I considered staying just for the great food. .And they told me no when I made a wrong choice.

I am excited about the Rose Bowl today. The Oregon Ducks won. Having lived in Oregon nineteen years, I am a fan. I was on the edge of my seat. What a great game. It could have gone either way. It made my day, but I had no snacks to eat. It may be a good thing to help keep my weight in check. I’m going to have to dig around for salt free snacks that I like. I have already tried baked chips — yuck! Unsalted popcorn is double Yuck! I like sugar free candy, but more than two pieces has me running to the restroom. Two pieces are not enough when you are watching a very tense football game. I’m sure there is something I would really like, but don’t bring up raw vegetables. I like them, but they are not a football snack. And everything else I can think of takes time to prepare. A good snack is something you can grab and eat immediately. Yes, you can do that with fruit, and when I get lots of money that is what I’ll so. For now, I miss my chips and dips.

It do not make New Years resolutions, but the no salt goal was set for me. I plan to follow through. I like breathing. I guess I will call that my new years resolution.

May this new-year bring the blessing of God for health and a growing love for our savior. Thanks for sticking with me through this trying fall. I have been hot and cold, off and on. I will be busy trying to get up a web site for the next while. A wonderful former member of my first youth group is setting it up, I have to get the photos and write ups for each drawing to her — soon! It will happen, but not likely as fast as she would like. I promised to help take down Christmas decoration in The Home tomorrow. Our Bible study starts up again tomorrow. And I have to go shopping and begin a whole new way. I am looking forward to it, but reading will add more time to the job than I have ever spent before.

CLUB MED

Miss me! I’ve been on vacation and for the entire week before I was getting ready.

I visited Harrison’s Club Med. The place is rather expensive, but well worth the money.

I was gone Friday, Saturday and returned today. The food was unbelievably good. There was a selection at each meal and all meals are done with room service. The help was warm, friendly. kind and on call 24 hours a day. I have rarely found such attentive people. There were times they came by just to talk. There were far most women than men and I was fine with that. As I left I talked to each one to express what a wonderful place this was, and how great the staff was, and how terrific the food was. On the negative checklist was: 1) ambience needed improvements and 3) the recreation sucked.

Almost immediately after the simple check in process, I was met and a second staff member drove me to the next phase of the check in. I initially cane in the wrong door and the right one was a long way. I liked the ride. A different person drove me to my accommodation. I was surprised to be the only one assigned to the room as all accommodations are based on double occupancy. There was no roommate available to share the share, but I was glad.

I was immediately given a menu from which to order. I made my decision while people buzzed around me doing all kinds of things. The young man who delivered me to my room was kind enough to remove my shoes and socks and replace them was a lovely warm grey no slip sock. No one commented on the gloss of the floors or warned me to be careful walking, but I could see that I should.

The food selection was excellent. I was determined to stay on a proper eating schedule and they have their own dietician to help the customers. I would like to know what spices they use to replace the salt. Probably Mrs. Dash.

On Friday I got the most attention. I lost track of how many came to check on me and do things and help me do things I didn’t even know I needed done. I was surprised when my whole family made a surprise appearance. I loved it however.

I was initially encountered a little British lady, who was a fireball. She was almost worth the price of admission. She had lived in places that didn’t even sound like countries to me. I am still sure she made some of them up.

While talking I discovered she had been all over the world. At least it seemed like it. In her line of work she traveled the world to fill in for people on vacation or maternity leave, missing in action, or whatever. I didn’t know there was such a temp job company. I got her history in a nutshell, her marriages, divorces, children, etc. I wanted to pump her for more because she was so interesting, but she had other customers to serve.

She was the one who stuck the IV in my right arm and inserted the oxygen in my nose. I didn’t really think I needed either, but she insisted — very strongly. My son-in-law took me through the check-in process. He knew the boss man who came for the check in. They go to the same church. Later a young man arrived to take my picture. My son-in-law knew him as well. It seems his twin brother in Chris’ class. The young man who took me to my room was a good driver a he never hit any one or anything coming around those blind corners traveling at the speed of light.

There was no grand welcoming party. We were not met at my accommodation by anyone. But it didn’t take long before they began to arrive one by one. The vampires wanted blood, the snakes wanted to squeeze my arm. Don’t use the toilet, pee in this little plastic bottle. “We’ll collect it later.” Weird. What were they going to do, drink it? I had not eaten since 7:45 that morning. It was then 3:30. Check-in began at 10:00. They weren’t ready for me I guess. My cards were in order, but I did not qualify for platinum card status, or so it seemed. I was not assigned luxury accommodation.

Recreation involved some cheerful youth pushing me around on a dolly so I could have my picture taken with various contraptions. Pictures, my foot! Nothing looked like a camera. They passed me though this very large ring that only looked fit for the Jolly Green Giant. What kind of pictures can a ring take? I had already had a large portable camera take my photo on the second stage of registration. They wanted to make sure I was qualified to join their club, I guess. I could hardly breath. O was also sent to a large camera. Strange. How many pictures did they need?

They sucked more blood and squeezed my arm until it lost its feeling. Then finally let me speak to a representative of the cook. By then they seemed to know all about me. No, you may not have that, nor that. Well what can I have? I ordered a very tasty meatloaf with potatoes and gravy, vegetables, a fruit bowl and bottled water with Crystal Light. It was wonderful. I was so glad I brought my latest J.A. Jance book with me. I had read nearly half of it before I got through the registration process. I was already tired of lying down and when I got to my room I had to lie down again. Admittedly this bed was more comfortable than the board I had been on for the ride to my place.

It felt like the vampire and snake came for a visit more than anyone else. That very day I was running out of places on my body to drain blood. I was beginning to think my decision to visit Club Med was a mistake.

I had had my sweatshirt and t-shirt stolen at registration and issued the Club Med official shirt. I hated it. It was too big. I do not wear size XXXXXL. The neck nearly sagged to my waist. I was constantly pushing it up. When my back and shoulders get cold, I am cold. I should have kept my big mouth shut. They turned the heat up all right; I was soon sweating so bad I cold barely sleep. They turned it back down.

I loved all my primary assistants They were women with a wonderful sense of humor and the ability to clarify things and keep me on track to meet my goals. I have barely gotten to my room when I was asked what mo goals were. With a stomach that was growling I said, “To eat” She wrote that on a white board. I laughed. It didn’t seem like a big enough deal. I added “to breath better.”

I actually slept rather well even though I was attached to machines with cords and had a transponder type box stuck in my shirt pocket. Who puts a shirt pocket in the middle? Very uncomfortable! The hardest part was being injected with a solution that made me pee every few minutes. And no one helped me in and out of bed. Yuck. I struggled getting around that bed rail and by the time I returned I was panting for breath. I made the visit because I was struggling breathing and they seemed to be making it worse. Then they would come and squeeze my arm. The numbers were high; they would also suck more blood. Never learned about that. I wanted to know if I was having a heart attack. They didn’t know, but they didn’t have another alternative yet.

The next day they took me for more pictures. One was innocent enough and I at least recognized the camera. The very nice gal taking those pictures said she remembered me from earlier in the year. She cheated. She just checked her notes. There was nothing to that one photo-op. I could not eat until after the second photo. I left the room at 10:00 a.m. and did not return until 3:30 p.m. talk about starved, this machine was an “L” shaped contraption that was pushed down on my stomach. I could not even see a lens. They told me it was reading the radiation in my body. Was I radioactive? No. About a half hour later, I thought that might be the problem. I was rolled to another room for what they called a stress test. I waited there a very long time. I think I fell asleep. When the test came I was told to just lie there and they would chemically stress me out. It took less than 60 seconds to be totally exhausted and about ten minutes to get relaxed again. I hated that. I had already waited an hour for the one man at this huge complex who was able to read the results. He did, but never told me what the answer was. It would take time.

I was back on the room to eat. My family was waiting there for me. They had been out for hamburgers. No, they did not bring one for me. I had baked cod. Very tasty! All the tests were completed, now we waited for the results. A Middle Eastern lady came before my family left and delivered the results. There was nothing wrong with my heart, but my body was retaining liquid, none in the lungs (a fear). They believed the liquid retention was from salt.

SALT! Then I began to think of Christmas Eve, I had little salty crackers with this wonderful shrimp dip. I had two helping of ham. My daughter sent ham home with me. I had ham every day. I love ham. This was terrific ham. I had caused the problem by eating too much salt. I even had popcorn for supper on Thursday night. I thought I was being careful. I no longer added salt to anything but popcorn. I can’t eat popcorn without salt and I am addicted to popcorn. I had salty products everyday for a week. I was shutting down the flow of blood.

Solution. Stop the salt intake. Now because of things that had run through my body, I would need to stay another night so they could flush my kidneys to get rid of the dye and saline solutions. Saturday morning I was feeling significantly better. The excellent cook was a major asset. The funny ladies who cared for me kept my spirits up and actually delivered more helpful information than anyone. They called my problem the holiday disease. People who make themselves sick by totally blowing their diet.

When back in my apartment my daughter and I went through my cupboards too remove everything with too much salt. Would you believe my cupboards are nearly bare?

I get paid on Tuesday. I think shopping will talk a long time this week. I need to watch the salt content like a hawk. It is just another step along life’s journey. I am also going to check and see if Social Security will help with a membership at the “Y”. That is past due.

I loved my visit to Harrison Hospital’s Club Med. The staff was terrific, the care exceptional, the attention to detail outstanding, the food exceptional (I want to eat there again). Overall, I loved the visit, but I hope to never visit again. But I know I will. My age indicates I will visit again — some day. When I do I hope I get to meet up with all those wonderful people on my next visit and if not them, people just like them.

Thank you friends at Harrison Club Med.

THE DAY AFTER

It was a thrill to walk into my daughter’s house and see the new stove. It is beautiful. My son-in-laws-brother arrived early on Saturday to correct the wiring problem. No problem for him. It was done without issue. Even better than seeing the stove was seeing her cooking on the stovetop with items in the oven as well. I had a brief cry again.

I love my son-in-laws family but I did approach the evening with some trepidation. The house is small. The living room, dining room and kitchen are all one room. While the kids could play some in the kid’s bedrooms upstairs, I suspected they would mostly be down stairs. They were.

The noise level built gradually. The early arrivers were able to play outside for a while. It was a beautiful day and the sun was shining. It looked like we should set out and decorate a palm tree. A light sweatshirt was all that was needed.

When all the cousins are together, there are nine. The last arrivals have four. They are loud and not always controlled. I watched the daughter peal an orange and drop the skins into an open bagged Christmas gift. I was the furthest adult from her, but maybe the only one who saw the action. I wanted to scream at her, but like a nice little grandpa I kept my mouth shut. I am not the parent.

While the noise was already at a Piper Cub sound level, it quickly grew to a Boeing 747 level. Getting their attention for prayer was a major undertaking. It took very little time for my head to begin throbbing. I could not follow any conversation and the chaos built until my nerves seemed to crash in. I pulled my daughter aside and tried to explain what was happening to me. I then excused myself and went home.

As I was driving away I noticed my churches Christmas Eve service was starting in fifteen minutes. I arrived only five minutes late. It was so peaceful and calm. It helped me come down gently. There was a beautiful violin as part of the smaller worship band. Peaceful. I needed that. It was good to be in the house of the Lord.

I was wiped out when I got home, but chose to finish my latest J.A. Jance mystery book. Great ending. She handles ending smoothly. They are dramatic, but not drawn out. After the killer is determined and caught, usually in the very true to life ways, there is a chapter taking the character back to normal life. I like that.

I returned to my daughters Christmas Day to be with just them. It was wonderful. We all have a great deal of excitement about that day. While excited, the kids are older and completely under control. I loved it. I left about 5:00 and came home only to fall asleep three times in my recliner. I had no reason to stay up even though was early but I could not seem to stay awake long enough make it to the bedroom. So, when I finally did wake up enough to move myself, I was wide-awake for another couple of hours. Yuck. I know I will nap off an on most of the day and I’m looking forward to it. My apartment needs to be cleaned, but tomorrow or the next day it can be done. After all, it is only I walking around in the dirt and I don’t mind — especially when it is my dirt.