A THREESOME

Have you ever been in a conversation near people who have nothing to do with the conversation, but have plenty to say? We have three women who all feel a need to put their three cents into any conversation whether they know what the topic is or not. They always correct, clarify deny and argue about the subject. Thankfully, I was not involved but sitting on the side trying not to laugh out loud.

Gail was having a pleasant conversation with the maintenance man about the water in our building. Gail lives over me and had asked me if my water tasted funny. As a matter of fact it had. However, I’m not reliable as the last time it tasted funny I had taken it with my pills and if I don’t get my pills all down at one there are two that taste awful. With all the nice flavors out there why can’t we have pills that taste good? I like vanilla, cherry, strawberry and blueberry.

Wayne was explaining that it couldn’t be the pipes as they are all copper. He wondered if was coming from the hot water tank, but it’s the cold water that tastes weird. Dear, dear Clare from building 2 was the first to help the conversation along. No, the pipes are plastic and there is nothing wrong with the water here. Our area is recognized as having the best tasting water in the whole area. Maria said that was two years ago. I only drink bottled water. That should have been the end of her contribution. We really didn’t even need that much. But she continued, it is probably rust in the pipes. It can’t be rust as there is no lead in our water system. Back to Clara, there must be as I get this brownish color coming from my pipes. Maria reminds Clara that we are talking about the other building. Meanwhile, Gail and Wayne cannot get a work in edgewise. Beside, Clara was defending the water a minute ago.

Wayne walked away after telling Clara you are going to have to call that in for repairs.
Dixie arrived to add her wonderful insights. The water here is terrible. Too many chemicals! Everything is old and falling apart. I would be surprised if roots haven’t split the pipes and dirt is in our system. And another adds her laundry is not always clean. I think that may have everything to do with how you wash them and not the water at all. It went on and Dixie, Clara and Maria continued to raise their voices and interrupt each other without solving a thing.

Meanwhile Gail and Wayne hook up, go to check her apartment and the problem is dirt in the filter at the end of the tap. He changed it and all is well. I ended up changing my own. I have some maintenance skills.

I went back about an hour later and the three buttinski’s are still at each other. I didn’t stay.

We had a picnic on our front porch today, as it was National Picnic Day. Naturally it was almost too cold to be out there. Picnics are to be pleasant enjoyable little gathering so I pretended it was a beautiful day and did not wear a sweatshirt. I was proud of my self. I lasted thirty minutes before the shivering got sever and the teeth chattering was interrupting the conversation and my shaking looked like palsy. This was a no host event. I know what that means. Maria will take charge. When I arrived she is directing people to get chairs, set up her TV trays and spread out along the railing. I got dirty looks because I wasn’t there earlier. I was on time, but not ahead of time. It was obvious she wanted to be the center of the conversation and all activities. She sat in the center where all could hear She was loud, talking so much and telling so many stories little conversations were developing on the fringes of the gathering. That only caused her to repeat her stories because everyone did not hear her the first time. She brought extra food for those who came with nothing. Since everyone brought her own she was busy trying to force her food on other. The great thing about extra food was Janet brought the best desserts. Everyone raved about the butterscotch squares and not one comments in the celery and chips. I knew I had to be gone before the end.

Maybe I was shaking from the shenanigans and not the cold. I went and had a nap. These days wear me out.

WORRY WORKS

I know nothing about the mechanics of cars. Dad tried to teach me. He and my three brothers talked cars but I always believed God created mechanics for things like that. So when I have a funny noise I do what any red blooded mechanical incompetent would do – I panic! I can’t just take the car in. I have to plan for it. While I call Costco the minimum $200 store, auto repair starts at $500. I don’t have $500. So rather than taking the car in right away, I worry about it. I know worrying works. My mother worried about everything and nothing she ever worried about came to pass. It’s a form of protection. I finally got a couple hundred dollars ahead and decided I needed to find out what the damage might be. You know — to plan ahead.

Taking a deep breathe and with fear in my stomach and probably the beginnings of an ulcer, I took it to the only place I know. My son-in-law recommended this place. It was a very slow day. So far so good! The owner came out, looked it over, listened to it, drove it around and put it up on a hoist. He sounded like a doctor. Humm! Ohhh! Ahem! I see. Then he talked with a flashlight and a screwdriver that doubled as a pointer. See this screw here. Yes. And this screw here. Yes. And this spot over here. Yes. Well, see this spot, there should be a screw here and there isn't one. It broke off. Nissans are notorious for having those screws break. My mind runs wild. You are going to have to have that fixed at some time. You are going to blow a gasket and then you are going to have to pull the air conditioner and lift part of the engine to repair that. Very expensive. Yes, expensive. Anything over $200 is very expensive to me, but those noises sounded like they were going to climb high over the typical auto repair minimum. I’m thinking $1,000 maybe $2,000. You know with this economy it is always better to fix a car than get another one. Yes and it is cheaper to have no car at all. But I want my car.

Now I’m afraid, very afraid. Sweat begins to run off my forehead. Of course we were standing in the sun on a very hot day. Maybe it was just the heat. But, He says, I wouldn’t do that now. There’s no leak. You can wait on that. The obvious sound of relief slips through my lips. My legs get weak. I reach for the car to hang on. I am relieved.

Now look over here. See what looks like wood chips. I hadn’t noticed until he pointed it out, but there were wood chips on top of my engine. They look fresh. That’s a mouse nest. You’re kidding. No, they climb up in there when the engine is warm. He fishes around with his flashlight and says I see a piece of a Starbucks cup, wood chips, paper bag, straw and part of a Costco bag. I had no idea mice shopped at Starbucks and Costco. I’ll tell you this. Mice must be highly over paid. OK, bad joke.

He dug around some more and finally said here’s the problem. This hose has been gnawed on and is leaking. It needs to be replaced. The mice were chewing through a water hose connecting to my heater. So that’s why my car would heat only off and on during the winter. You mean you are just now bringing the car in? Sheepishly I nod my head. I did not want to give an enthusiastic response to that question.

He called one of his guys over and told him what needed to be done and mentioned it would be done in 30 minutes. A hose. That shouldn’t be to bad, and it wasn’t. This shop has no such thing as a waiting room, so I sat in a chair next to the boss and he told me all about his fishing trips and the size of various fish he has caught. I did everything I could to seem interested. See, it’s not just cars I care little about; I have no interest in fishing either, but I will eat what you catch. I don’t know what he thought about me, but I was struggling to sound interested. Fortunately, as enthusiasm was waning, the job finished.

I now fully accept the one thing that my mother tried to teach me years ago. Worry works. I only spent $49 on that repair. Whew!